I have had a pretty rough winter, dealing with depression and family drama, and I feel like I am finally coming out of it. The change in weather has been good for me, and I hope to get on this more frequently. I have so much to share with all of you! For now, I am trying to get our house company ready. NO before/after shots, as I am truly embarassed at the amount of clutter that has built up around here the last 7 months!
To do:
Prep lasagene, start foccacia, make salad dressing
Tidy up and vaccuum front room
de-clutter kitchen
fold and put away laundry
scrub out bathroom
If I have time:
organize paperwork
boil and sun pocket diapers (they have developed a smell lately)
make apple pie
Showing posts with label trials. Show all posts
Showing posts with label trials. Show all posts
Friday, May 20, 2011
Thursday, June 24, 2010
overdoing it
Whenever I am doing something I shouldn't be doing, I get stopped. Yesterday it was simply walking to the store with the kiddos, and, well, shopping, losing my coupon organizer (which had coupons, store credits and gift certificates in it) stressing out, finding it, then taking a phone call I should have let go to voice mail, then letting said phone call stress me out, then walking back home with a cranky 3 year old in tow...and all without eating a proper meal first. I almost didn't make it home. We wound up sitting under a tree at the gas station a block form our home, raiding our groceries for a snack. I had to go slooooowly and pause every ten yards or so. It helped that J. was totally enthralled with the dandelion seed flowers and kept stopping to pick and blow them. In retrospect I can see that i was "Setting myself up for failure" but at the time I was just working down my "to-do" list and ignoring my instincts. I had to spend the remainder of the day resting, and coping with lots of annoying (but not painful) braxton-hicks contractions...they seem to be triggered by stress lately.
God gave us instincts for a reason. I firmly believe He speaks to us in that way, allowing us to choose weather or not to listen. I am listening loud and clear.
I will not go out alone like that again. I will allow my hubby to take care of me. I am (slowly) learning not to let others and my own guilt have so much power over me--realizing that I can control how I let things get to me.
Today I feel free. I am happily resting and puttering about. I found an adorable crochet pattern for a little girls poncho and I hope to finish it by the time the baby comes. Just for today, I will forget the outside world exists and do what my mind and body wants to do...relax, focus inwards, and enjoy this little blessing growing inside.
God gave us instincts for a reason. I firmly believe He speaks to us in that way, allowing us to choose weather or not to listen. I am listening loud and clear.
I will not go out alone like that again. I will allow my hubby to take care of me. I am (slowly) learning not to let others and my own guilt have so much power over me--realizing that I can control how I let things get to me.
Today I feel free. I am happily resting and puttering about. I found an adorable crochet pattern for a little girls poncho and I hope to finish it by the time the baby comes. Just for today, I will forget the outside world exists and do what my mind and body wants to do...relax, focus inwards, and enjoy this little blessing growing inside.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Impression without expression...
...leads to depression.
and was I "depressed" yesterday! I was having an off-day and decided to putter about online a bit. I found some radio and video programs by the author of "from boom to bust and beyond" Jerry Tuma. The man is an economist and he uses demographics to predict/explain the current economic and social crisis. It is AMAZING stuff! There was just so much in it, and I had nobody really to share it with, my darling hubby was just too exhausted from the daily grind to listen to the complex details. Poor guy, but I guess that is my privilege in being able to stay at home and manage my own days. I do get to spend quite alot of time learning new things. I really really enjoy listening to lectures and sermons online while I putter about the house doing chores and playing with the boys.
Back to Jerry Tuma. He predicted the housing market bubble, quite easily and used demographics (the study of populations) to explain what may happen next. Here goes..
Most People reach the peak of their "spending" power in their late 40's, this is when they buy the house and all the fancy stuff inside. The baby-boomers have been buying up homes for quite some time now. The last--and biggest wave of boomers hit that critical time in 2005. The market was peaked (also super inflated due to the large demand for homes) builders kept on building, the next generational wave is MUCH smaller than the boomers (thank you birth control and the changing attitudes towards children in society) and therefore we wound up with too many houses and not enough people to buy them. If you pair that with the fact that people took out unsustainable loans and were foreclosed on housing values plummeted. We have NOT bottomed out yet. The ARM loans (the ones where your rate is fixed super low for 5 years then go up) as well as the "liars loans" (those that required absolutely NO income verification and had adjustable rates) are about to come due. Nearly 7 million more homes will be foreclosed on in the coming two years. It looks dire.
BUT there is good news! It will be prime time to invest in real estate in the next 2-3 years! Start saving every penny you can now, and perhaps you may find a real bargain coming up!
History repeats itself, during the great depression when so many lost everything, those who were prepared for the coming crash made MILLIONS. Properties were picked up for pennies on the dollar, good stocks and investments were purchased at all time low prices and when everything recovered, their net worth did too. The same can happen for us if we look at this as an opportunity and not a time to panic.
We are also, living in a time of a generational and a demographic change. Neil Howe has written a book "The fourth turning" using History to describe what is/may happen in the coming years. His book was written in the mid-90's when we were in the middle of the greatest economic upswing in our history and nobody paid attention. He accurately predicted the economic crash...as an event that would change us all starting in about 2005. HMMMM....did you know this has all happened before? Holland and the tulips anyone? His point of view is a generational one. Basically that every 'fourth' generation there is a rebirth or death of society. Every generation in history has connected with and acted like a previous one, and economics and politics have reflected that as well. We (those of us born in 1982 and after) are now emerging onto the political scene, and things are going to be shook up. Basically we all follow the same pattern: Generation 1 experiences a conservative high after a major war, the 2nd gen hits the spiritual revival mode, 3rd Gen has the wild unraveling of all the values that have come before, and the 4th generation experiences the Crisis that will reset or change everything. Generation 1 raised gen 3, Gen 2 raised Gen 4. Gen 4 has little contact with Gen 1 and therefore does not learn from their experiences so society must re-invent the wheel. This could be very very good, or very very bad. During this time of Crisis a political party will set itself up and try their darnedest to patch things up, but it most likely will not work...its the ones that come immediately after that will establish what America will look like for the next FOUR generations.
Once again, there is hope. WE can change things, as long as enough of us wake up and start voting our values and shaking up the political and social systems. Don't be afraid to express your beliefs and values, live the life you want to live and change your corner of the universe!
The third thing is mentioned a bit by both authors (please note, I haven't been able to read the books yet, I am discussing based on their interviews and radio broadcasts) Is the demographic switch. Europe is in the middle of a demographic crisis. The birth rate in many countries are FAR below replacement levels (in fact, the world birthrates are just about there as well) Meaning there are less young workers to support the elderly retired. (china, anyone?) this is BAD for our current economy, and our social programs--all of which are based on an ever-growing economy. America is about 10-15 years behind Europe (I still find it odd that half of Europe is going bankrupt due to unsustainable government funded health care, retirements ect. and yet our politicians keep saying we NEED to be like them, it will save our society!) Basically Europe is dying off, and we are quickly following. Now, there are three things that can be done about this. 1.people can have more babies--many countries now offer tax breaks and outright payments to native-born citizens who are willing to have more children. This has not worked so far. 2. Active immigration. Allow those from developing countries (who have growing populations) to become citizens and start paying taxes. or 3. Change the system. (Yeah right, who wants to give up all their "free" government benefits and start doing things on their own.)
SO, in reflection of all these ramblings here are my thoughts: This has all happened before and it will all happen again, there is nothing new under the sun. History has shown that. We will not repeat it exactly but it will echo the past. WE are in the midst of a great change, and if we stand strong and trust in God there is a chance for a great rebirth of society and even personal economic prosperity.
What will I do? Save every penny I can squeeze out of my budget and get ready for the second wave of real estate foreclosures. I will continue to support politicians who want to radically change government BACK to the values of the constitution and who practice sound fiscal policy, who have strong moral character and a sense of absolute truth. I will keep having babies and not let this crisis mode destroy our dreams.
whew. that was a tiring post, I hope it made sense! I am off to find some more stuff to study!
and was I "depressed" yesterday! I was having an off-day and decided to putter about online a bit. I found some radio and video programs by the author of "from boom to bust and beyond" Jerry Tuma. The man is an economist and he uses demographics to predict/explain the current economic and social crisis. It is AMAZING stuff! There was just so much in it, and I had nobody really to share it with, my darling hubby was just too exhausted from the daily grind to listen to the complex details. Poor guy, but I guess that is my privilege in being able to stay at home and manage my own days. I do get to spend quite alot of time learning new things. I really really enjoy listening to lectures and sermons online while I putter about the house doing chores and playing with the boys.
Back to Jerry Tuma. He predicted the housing market bubble, quite easily and used demographics (the study of populations) to explain what may happen next. Here goes..
Most People reach the peak of their "spending" power in their late 40's, this is when they buy the house and all the fancy stuff inside. The baby-boomers have been buying up homes for quite some time now. The last--and biggest wave of boomers hit that critical time in 2005. The market was peaked (also super inflated due to the large demand for homes) builders kept on building, the next generational wave is MUCH smaller than the boomers (thank you birth control and the changing attitudes towards children in society) and therefore we wound up with too many houses and not enough people to buy them. If you pair that with the fact that people took out unsustainable loans and were foreclosed on housing values plummeted. We have NOT bottomed out yet. The ARM loans (the ones where your rate is fixed super low for 5 years then go up) as well as the "liars loans" (those that required absolutely NO income verification and had adjustable rates) are about to come due. Nearly 7 million more homes will be foreclosed on in the coming two years. It looks dire.
BUT there is good news! It will be prime time to invest in real estate in the next 2-3 years! Start saving every penny you can now, and perhaps you may find a real bargain coming up!
History repeats itself, during the great depression when so many lost everything, those who were prepared for the coming crash made MILLIONS. Properties were picked up for pennies on the dollar, good stocks and investments were purchased at all time low prices and when everything recovered, their net worth did too. The same can happen for us if we look at this as an opportunity and not a time to panic.
We are also, living in a time of a generational and a demographic change. Neil Howe has written a book "The fourth turning" using History to describe what is/may happen in the coming years. His book was written in the mid-90's when we were in the middle of the greatest economic upswing in our history and nobody paid attention. He accurately predicted the economic crash...as an event that would change us all starting in about 2005. HMMMM....did you know this has all happened before? Holland and the tulips anyone? His point of view is a generational one. Basically that every 'fourth' generation there is a rebirth or death of society. Every generation in history has connected with and acted like a previous one, and economics and politics have reflected that as well. We (those of us born in 1982 and after) are now emerging onto the political scene, and things are going to be shook up. Basically we all follow the same pattern: Generation 1 experiences a conservative high after a major war, the 2nd gen hits the spiritual revival mode, 3rd Gen has the wild unraveling of all the values that have come before, and the 4th generation experiences the Crisis that will reset or change everything. Generation 1 raised gen 3, Gen 2 raised Gen 4. Gen 4 has little contact with Gen 1 and therefore does not learn from their experiences so society must re-invent the wheel. This could be very very good, or very very bad. During this time of Crisis a political party will set itself up and try their darnedest to patch things up, but it most likely will not work...its the ones that come immediately after that will establish what America will look like for the next FOUR generations.
Once again, there is hope. WE can change things, as long as enough of us wake up and start voting our values and shaking up the political and social systems. Don't be afraid to express your beliefs and values, live the life you want to live and change your corner of the universe!
The third thing is mentioned a bit by both authors (please note, I haven't been able to read the books yet, I am discussing based on their interviews and radio broadcasts) Is the demographic switch. Europe is in the middle of a demographic crisis. The birth rate in many countries are FAR below replacement levels (in fact, the world birthrates are just about there as well) Meaning there are less young workers to support the elderly retired. (china, anyone?) this is BAD for our current economy, and our social programs--all of which are based on an ever-growing economy. America is about 10-15 years behind Europe (I still find it odd that half of Europe is going bankrupt due to unsustainable government funded health care, retirements ect. and yet our politicians keep saying we NEED to be like them, it will save our society!) Basically Europe is dying off, and we are quickly following. Now, there are three things that can be done about this. 1.people can have more babies--many countries now offer tax breaks and outright payments to native-born citizens who are willing to have more children. This has not worked so far. 2. Active immigration. Allow those from developing countries (who have growing populations) to become citizens and start paying taxes. or 3. Change the system. (Yeah right, who wants to give up all their "free" government benefits and start doing things on their own.)
SO, in reflection of all these ramblings here are my thoughts: This has all happened before and it will all happen again, there is nothing new under the sun. History has shown that. We will not repeat it exactly but it will echo the past. WE are in the midst of a great change, and if we stand strong and trust in God there is a chance for a great rebirth of society and even personal economic prosperity.
What will I do? Save every penny I can squeeze out of my budget and get ready for the second wave of real estate foreclosures. I will continue to support politicians who want to radically change government BACK to the values of the constitution and who practice sound fiscal policy, who have strong moral character and a sense of absolute truth. I will keep having babies and not let this crisis mode destroy our dreams.
whew. that was a tiring post, I hope it made sense! I am off to find some more stuff to study!
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Potty training disaster
So, I decided to potty train both my boys at once, using the three day method my cousin Sharon recommended...It worked quite well for her daughter. Well, doing two at once was a total disaster. Garrett was back at work and I had quite a few hilarious/annoying potty spills. I did learn some valuable info, however. My boys are on a very similar schedule. When I would catch one and put him on the potty, the other would immediately have an accident. I quickly learned to herd them both into the bathroom and close the door! S. would retreat to the corner and pee while I was helping J. The funniest/most stressful moment came when we were doing dishes. S. was playing in the water and started to go, I quickly snatched him up and ran to the potty, I sat him down and he stopped. we waited a bit, changed him and went back only for him to repeat the performance FOUR more times. Apparently the child cannot pee unless he is standing up. J. my three year old did not fare much better, I was often quite distracted with little brother and missed opportunities with him as well. He did stay dry during nap, but had an accident while climbing out of his bed (right onto the changing table, I might add) we will soon see if he made it through the night.
For the sake of my sanity, the floor, and the boy's ability to go, I have decided to just focus on J. at the moment. S. is back in diapers and will remain so for at least the next two weeks! Furtehr updates will come.
I do have a busy day, my sister in law and her baby and a friend with her newborn will be coming over for lunch and I NEED to get this place cleaned up, QUICK!
For the sake of my sanity, the floor, and the boy's ability to go, I have decided to just focus on J. at the moment. S. is back in diapers and will remain so for at least the next two weeks! Furtehr updates will come.
I do have a busy day, my sister in law and her baby and a friend with her newborn will be coming over for lunch and I NEED to get this place cleaned up, QUICK!
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Doing things as grandma would have...
Or should I say Great- or even Great-Great grandma, providing of course that she had an electric washing machine, and that, indeed, she allowed it to do its thing without first manually filling it with buckets of water collected the previous day and hand-agitating it every time the cycle changes--like two grandmas i happen to know.
sigh
I want to cultivate in myself the skills attitudes and do-it-yourself tenacity and work ethic our fore mothers had, with, of course just a few modern modifications. I love my washer. I will not give it up. I will however, hang my clothing out to dry and mix up my own laundry detergent.
I feel like I have had a crash course in some of the harder aspects of the past. Garrett's been gone these two weeks and I can now appreciate first-hand the emotional roller-coaster a lone woman went through while her husband went off to war, or elsewhere following the work. Of course, my hunny is only a 20 minute drive away, and me and the boys do get to see him several times a week, but those times without his humor and help just seem so much duller, and more difficult.
Currently we are sleep deprived, and I will be putting the kids down EARLY. I was hoping for 7, but they're pretty wound up due to the time change. Maybe 8. Then I'm crashing. To heck with the housework. I need sleep.
sigh
I want to cultivate in myself the skills attitudes and do-it-yourself tenacity and work ethic our fore mothers had, with, of course just a few modern modifications. I love my washer. I will not give it up. I will however, hang my clothing out to dry and mix up my own laundry detergent.
I feel like I have had a crash course in some of the harder aspects of the past. Garrett's been gone these two weeks and I can now appreciate first-hand the emotional roller-coaster a lone woman went through while her husband went off to war, or elsewhere following the work. Of course, my hunny is only a 20 minute drive away, and me and the boys do get to see him several times a week, but those times without his humor and help just seem so much duller, and more difficult.
Currently we are sleep deprived, and I will be putting the kids down EARLY. I was hoping for 7, but they're pretty wound up due to the time change. Maybe 8. Then I'm crashing. To heck with the housework. I need sleep.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Rest..vs...Idleness
I must say I have a great deal of trouble with this thought. What is rest, and what is idleness? Often when I collapse on the couch or hop online, I feel that I should be doing something else, something more productive. Pretty much any time I am doing anything, I feel a nagging guilt that I should be doing something else. So pretty much I feel rushed/guilty/resentful all of the time.
It needs to stop.
There is a healthy balance between rest and idleness. Also between keeping house and homemaking. I don't want to be so consumed by cleaning and tidying that I don't have time for my family, I also don't want to live in squalor, which I feel very close to now as the entire family has been passing the flu/head colds back and forth.
I am drained. I am in need of some rest.
My new goal is to live in the moment. When blogging, I will blog and not worry about the dishes, when doing dishes I will not rush...and do a bad job..because I am worried about getting the floors done.
So, today's goals:
1. REST
2. Finish the dishes.
3. vacuum
4. Tidy the boy's room
5. Run to the store to get milk.
It needs to stop.
There is a healthy balance between rest and idleness. Also between keeping house and homemaking. I don't want to be so consumed by cleaning and tidying that I don't have time for my family, I also don't want to live in squalor, which I feel very close to now as the entire family has been passing the flu/head colds back and forth.
I am drained. I am in need of some rest.
My new goal is to live in the moment. When blogging, I will blog and not worry about the dishes, when doing dishes I will not rush...and do a bad job..because I am worried about getting the floors done.
So, today's goals:
1. REST
2. Finish the dishes.
3. vacuum
4. Tidy the boy's room
5. Run to the store to get milk.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
The end of the Media Fast
ok, well, it ended about a week ago, but I thought I should post a few reflections here>
Reflection #1. turning off the tv/talk radio brings an instant peaceful feeling into ones home.
Reflection #2. I really really, really like tv.
Reflection #3. I can get so much accomplished if I just focus on the task at hand. For example, folding the laundry as it dries and immediately putting it away, as opposed to letting it pile up onto the couch then settling down to watch an episode of CSI and sloooooowly folding it.
Reflection #4. I didn't miss much. other than a story arc or two, but nothing of a real, lasting value was missed out on.
Reflection #5. Simplicity is much better achieved without constant "noise" urging on my fleshly desires....for more food, more land, better cleaning supplies, more useless political debate.
So there it is in a nutshell. I was also surprised at how much of the Bible I was able to read thru...I am reading it chronologically and am in the midst of 2 Samuel/psalms. Need to get back to that.
I did enjoy the experience, however found myself at constant war with it at the same time. I am choosing to continue with a "partial" media fast from here on. I have just been making the decision to leave the tv or pc or radio off. untll my work is "done" (ha!) and then I make sure to have some sort of busy activity at hand...crocheting a new hat for myself at the moment. I am really enjoying this lessened dependency on outside stimulation!
Reflection #1. turning off the tv/talk radio brings an instant peaceful feeling into ones home.
Reflection #2. I really really, really like tv.
Reflection #3. I can get so much accomplished if I just focus on the task at hand. For example, folding the laundry as it dries and immediately putting it away, as opposed to letting it pile up onto the couch then settling down to watch an episode of CSI and sloooooowly folding it.
Reflection #4. I didn't miss much. other than a story arc or two, but nothing of a real, lasting value was missed out on.
Reflection #5. Simplicity is much better achieved without constant "noise" urging on my fleshly desires....for more food, more land, better cleaning supplies, more useless political debate.
So there it is in a nutshell. I was also surprised at how much of the Bible I was able to read thru...I am reading it chronologically and am in the midst of 2 Samuel/psalms. Need to get back to that.
I did enjoy the experience, however found myself at constant war with it at the same time. I am choosing to continue with a "partial" media fast from here on. I have just been making the decision to leave the tv or pc or radio off. untll my work is "done" (ha!) and then I make sure to have some sort of busy activity at hand...crocheting a new hat for myself at the moment. I am really enjoying this lessened dependency on outside stimulation!
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Bitterness...
It is strange how it can creep in...I had no idea how much a hold it had on my life until recently, When Garrett made an offhanded comment about our small "pit" of a house. The remark quite hurt--in light of how hard I have been trying of late to make it nice.
That was when I realized how much my poor attitude had been affecting him. I had made him feel as if he couldn't provide for our needs.
I am grateful that I was confronted with this. I am actively working on my attitude, and asking the Lord to change my heart. We have been blessed...very blessed with a cozy home, and a nice large grassy area for the boys to run in, and a pool I don't have to tend!
That was when I realized how much my poor attitude had been affecting him. I had made him feel as if he couldn't provide for our needs.
I am grateful that I was confronted with this. I am actively working on my attitude, and asking the Lord to change my heart. We have been blessed...very blessed with a cozy home, and a nice large grassy area for the boys to run in, and a pool I don't have to tend!
Sunday, October 18, 2009
The great TV turn-off
The other day as I was scrambling about attempting to clean the house up before bed, I became aware of something....the radio that I depended on to keep me upbeat as I did my chores...was just noise. really annoying distracting sounds jarring me as I attempted to get things done. So I turned it off. And I turned off the TV, and anything else I could find that added to the audio confusion.
The sound of silence.
My entire being relaxed, and I was able to finish up what I needed to do, with a far more cheerful outlook. I have now embarked upon a "40 day media-fast" That's right, I am not watching, listening to or reading anything of my own free will. I have even gone so far as to put all of my library books away...some only half-read! That was soooo hard! There are a few exceptions 1. I will continue reading my bible and the study book I have been going through. 2. I will read the boys their story books. 3. I will watch a tv show or movie if Garret specifically requests it. 4. Classical music or the kid's CD's are ok as well. 5. I will read anything necessary for my volunteer work.
It has been 3 days so far, and I have only slipped up once...reading a bit of the news while I was balancing my checkbook online. I can't tell you how relaxed I feel! I have had so much more free time as well! Garrett knows what I am doing, and actually hasn't requested I watch anything so far...but tonight is our usual "TV" night in which we catch up on episodes online. You know, I always thought He was the one turning on the tv, but as it turns out, I usually request to watch something....and then it just stays on. Shame on me!
I will continue to updated you on how things are going...I can tell this may be a bumpy ride!
The sound of silence.
My entire being relaxed, and I was able to finish up what I needed to do, with a far more cheerful outlook. I have now embarked upon a "40 day media-fast" That's right, I am not watching, listening to or reading anything of my own free will. I have even gone so far as to put all of my library books away...some only half-read! That was soooo hard! There are a few exceptions 1. I will continue reading my bible and the study book I have been going through. 2. I will read the boys their story books. 3. I will watch a tv show or movie if Garret specifically requests it. 4. Classical music or the kid's CD's are ok as well. 5. I will read anything necessary for my volunteer work.
It has been 3 days so far, and I have only slipped up once...reading a bit of the news while I was balancing my checkbook online. I can't tell you how relaxed I feel! I have had so much more free time as well! Garrett knows what I am doing, and actually hasn't requested I watch anything so far...but tonight is our usual "TV" night in which we catch up on episodes online. You know, I always thought He was the one turning on the tv, but as it turns out, I usually request to watch something....and then it just stays on. Shame on me!
I will continue to updated you on how things are going...I can tell this may be a bumpy ride!
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
introspection
There was a time in my life when I was desperate to do something of great significance for the Kingdom of God. I longed to make an eternal impact, to leave a mark, so to speak. As I pondered my future I had opposing thoughts. The first was how can I serve the lord if I do not have a Husband? The second, how can I serve Him if I do? The apostle Paul lets young ladies know, that before they are married they are single-hearted in their devotion to God. (1 Corinthians 7:34 (New International Version) An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband.) A married woman lives divided, attempting to please her husband and her Lord.
I can say this is absolutely true! The single years I had after I recommitted my life to God, and before I met my husband, were a time of rapid spiritual growth. I experienced a freedom to go wherever I was needed and served Him at various Youth camps.
After Garrett and I married, I found that my spiritual growth changed. For a time, I felt it had stopped, but hindsight puts it in a clearer light. Marriage has been a crucible for me. I don't like introspection, in fact, I can be quite fearful of it. However, when I was young I prayed that the Lord bring any circumstance into my life to mold me into the woman He wants me to be. Tough prayer. Lately I have been confronted with some very uncomfortable facts about myself. I have learned that, indeed, I am not perfect. sometimes, I am not even "not too bad" the Lord has revealed to me many aspects of my character that are not good. I am attempting to remedy them now. I am sure that life will bring them to the forefront time and time again. I am learning to welcome adversity. with every new trial, i am strengthened, and refined a bit more. Eventually I hope to be a woman of great faith, who is able to tackle any problem with a peaceful spirit. so, today I say, Bring it on Lord!
I can say this is absolutely true! The single years I had after I recommitted my life to God, and before I met my husband, were a time of rapid spiritual growth. I experienced a freedom to go wherever I was needed and served Him at various Youth camps.
After Garrett and I married, I found that my spiritual growth changed. For a time, I felt it had stopped, but hindsight puts it in a clearer light. Marriage has been a crucible for me. I don't like introspection, in fact, I can be quite fearful of it. However, when I was young I prayed that the Lord bring any circumstance into my life to mold me into the woman He wants me to be. Tough prayer. Lately I have been confronted with some very uncomfortable facts about myself. I have learned that, indeed, I am not perfect. sometimes, I am not even "not too bad" the Lord has revealed to me many aspects of my character that are not good. I am attempting to remedy them now. I am sure that life will bring them to the forefront time and time again. I am learning to welcome adversity. with every new trial, i am strengthened, and refined a bit more. Eventually I hope to be a woman of great faith, who is able to tackle any problem with a peaceful spirit. so, today I say, Bring it on Lord!
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